I used to view marriage through my own perception, based on what I saw transpire between my parents growing up. But as I’ve matured in my faith, I’ve realized just how special marriage is to God. Paul compares the relationship between Christ and the church to that of a husband and wife, highlighting Christ’s love and commitment to his church, just as a husband loves and cares for his wife.

We are called to love, honor, and serve our spouses, making their needs a priority every day. But what does that look like in our hectic, day-to-day lives?

Here are 10 ways to honor and show love to your husband (since this blog is aimed toward moms/wives):

1. Praise him privately and in public. A man wants to be his wife’s superhero. He wants her to trust him and be proud of him. He wants to provide for her and protect her. He wants to fix things for her and surprise her. He wants to make her smile.
2. Let him lead. God has positioned him to be the spiritual leader of your household. As long as he’s not abusing that power, and he prioritizes your needs, let him lead. Let him try to fix things without snarky comments from you. Trust him to make decisions that involve the family’s safety and well-being. If he proves he isn’t prioritizing the family’s safety and well-being, then have a conversation about that and come up with a plan to help him step into that role.
3. Show interest in things he’s interested in and ask about his day. Truly listen, as you want him to listen to you. Show compassion if he’s had a hard day.
4. Be sure to show him physical affection and make time for him. Most men’s top love languages are physical touch and quality time. They relate physical touch to emotional connection. (Women are wired a bit differently – they prefer emotional connection before physical connection.) A hug, a hand hold, or a shoulder rub can go a long way to show you care. It’s actually been proven scientifically that a 20-second hug heals things within the body.
5. Make time for him. I know that can be challenging when you have little ones tugging on you. That’s how it was for me for many years. Not just my kids but all the little ones who came through my daycare. And just when we had our kids almost raised, the grandkids came along. So, my husband has had to compete with them for my time as well. I didn’t do a great job of prioritizing him throughout our years together, but I’m learning just how important it is now. I love spending time just the two of us. One day your kids will all be grown and it’ll be back to the two of you. Make sure to fill your marriage cup along the way so it won’t be empty when that time comes, and you divorce because you realize the children were the only thing keeping you together all those years. 
6. Do something special for him, something that lets him know you thought of him. Make his favorite breakfast or dinner. Plan a special date night or weekend for the two of you. Go hunting or fishing with him. (or whatever his hobby is) Plan a picnic lunch by the lake.
7. Surprise him by breaking up his day. Climb into his lap while he’s working on the computer. Rub his shoulders while he’s working on the computer or reading or working on his car. Pull him away from his desk, chair, or task and dance with him, even without music. Turn on his favorite song and do a little strip tease for him. Send him a sexy text or leave a sexy note in his truck.
8. Talk him up in front of your children, rather than talking down about him. No matter what’s going on in your relationship, it doesn’t need to affect your children’s relationship with your husband. (aside from abuse cases, of course) Your children should see their dad as their superhero as well. This is an area where I have failed many times, and still find myself falling back into that trap sometimes, especially now that my kids are grown. All I can do is ask for the Lord to forgive me and work on doing better. 
9. Say “Thank You” when he does something for you, no matter how small. Don’t you want him to thank you for the things you do? Doesn’t it make you feel good when he says, “Dinner was delicious, babe. Thank you,”? Be sure to do the same when he does something – cleans, cooks, takes you out to dinner, etc. I used to feel weird about saying “Thank You” to my husband for these things because in my mind all I could think was Why should I thank him for things he ought to be doing anyway? But I later realized that when I thanked him, he had a tendency to do even more sweet things for me without prompting.
10. Pray with him, for him, and over him. Ask him to lead you in prayer or simply ask if you can pray for him. One thing you might notice when you pray aloud with/for your husband, he will smile and be taken aback if this is not something you’ve ever done or talked about. Over time, it might even lead to him being the one to lead the prayer, if he doesn’t already. Prayer is powerful. We can stand in the gap for those we love through prayer. 

So there are 10 things you can do to show your husband you love him. Men are often viewed as the “strong” ones of the family, but emotionally, and especially when it comes to their wives…they just want to be loved and want us to be proud to be married to them. 

Some women view the words “respect” and “honor” in a negative light, as if they’re somehow portraying a form of subservience. But that’s not what God’s intention was for marriage. He said it was not good for man to be alone. He created husbands and wives to be companions, partners, and friends. God calls us to love and serve one another as he loves us. Before you take marriage or relationship advice from someone, make sure that person has the kind of relationship you desire. If not, take their advice with a grain of salt. 

What kinds of things do you do to show your husband love?